My Joy List
May 20th-28th: food on food in Copenhagen, turning down the shiny things, & silly, out-of-the-box, break-the-rules creativity
You’re reading a newsletter from Syd, an NYC-born gal who quit her “golden handcuffs” job and moved to Amsterdam to follow her heart’s calls for a path less traveled. Here, I share the challenges and wins of my own journey from people pleasing & perfectionism to authenticity, balance, joy, & freedom. Beyond this page, I coach fellow high achievers along their own journey. You may find comfort, empowerment, inspiration, and/or community. Welcome 🫶🏻
Hi my sunshiney ones! :)
I’m writing this with one hand, with my laptop on the rim of the couch. As I sat down, Ruby made my lap into her bed and my arm into her pillow, and I was reminded once again of this question that keeps popping into my head: what are my priorities?
Just before this, while walking Ruby around the block, I felt a pull to check LinkedIn for engagement with yesterday’s post about episode 2 of The Path Less Traveled. But between the thought and the action was just enough space for me to ask: is checking notifications while I’m on a walk surrounded by nature, a quiet street, and Ruby, going to bring me happiness?
Similarly, when she plopped in my lap, the thought of “this is inconvenient”—a thought that urges me to push away the love that’s literally in my lap—quickly transformed into the warm and fuzzy feelings associated with, “wow, she is so freaking cute.”
But I’m not always good at this. Last week, A highlighted that I blocked out his and Ruby’s love when I became hyper-focused while putting my joy list email together.
It’s really easy to unknowingly look right past the exact things that fill me with love and joy. Sometimes, I have a plan of what I want to do and then the love/joy-inducing thing “interrupts.” Other times, I am with the love/joy-inducing thing when I feel a knee jerk pull to focus on something “shiny” (i.e. dopamine-inducing) that’s really not part of what makes me deeply, truly happy.
Noticing misalignment between 1) a desire and 2) our values/priorities before acting on the desire is one of the most important things we can do for living in a way that’s most conducive to our happiness. Choosing what I value over the shiny object feels so good. Every. Single. Time.
I know it sounds cliche, but it’s recommended so often for a reason: a formal mindfulness practice is gold for developing this habit.
Speaking of, my formal mindfulness practice hasn’t been very consistent since we got Ruby in January.
In some ways, it’s been nice.
When I sit to meditate (usually kundalini with Erika), I do so intentionally rather than on autopilot due to a daily routine. On other days, I listen when my body calls for movement and practice mindfulness while on a walk, in the gym, or through some form of yoga/pilates. Then, there are the days when my body is hungry for breakfast right away and I aim to slowly and mindfully assemble my parfait. And still, on other days, I jump right into “doing.” (All of this happens after my morning pages, where I get a pulse check on what I’m feeling and need that day.)
But there’s this direct line of access to my inner-most sunshine, my spirit, that feels less vibrant and clear than when I was formally meditating almost daily. That access and the aura it breeds is a huge part of who I am when I visualize my highest self—the person I am when I’m my happiest and healthiest. I want to reignite that essence, and so I am renewing my commitment to meditating near daily, with at least 5 minutes as my starting goal. Always start smaller than you think you can do.
In other news, this past weekend…
I went to Copenhagen for an incredible food conference where I was surrounded by many of the top chefs and other food-involved people in the world. I want to share more about what it was like to be there, but not here. Perhaps a podcast episode? Anyway, what you will find here (in the list below!) are some amazing Cope spots. It’s somehow my 6th time in Cope, so you can also check out my needs-to-be-updated-but-still-spot-on guide here. Gosh, I love that city.
AND it was Ruby’s first flight. Eeep! The lead up was nerve racking, but it turned out to be an incredibly smooth journey. Girly slept the whole flight. GRATEFUL! Such wanderlust parents really lucked out with a wanderlust pup.
Okokok now that I’ve chewed your ear off, shall we get into the JOYS!? Happy joy spotting :)
Joy spotting: the practice of noticing little moments of joy surrounding us all the time (more)
Rubs running out of the bathroom proudly with the plunger in her mouth
Catching up with Rebs over an afternoon walk in the park
The way Rubs smiles while waiting for us to hide her toys so she can seek them
Spotting Rubs in the video on the doggy day care’s instagram
The photo of Rubs smiling at doggy day care
The little smiley face on the strawberries on my nails
Laughing with Deniz over my piano lesson
Deniz’s compliment on my strawberry nails
My first taste of the asparagus soup and salmon I made for dinner, realizing they were really good
Hitting publish on the pod episode with Justin
Watching A get his suit measurement
Looking at wedding bands with A
Rubs getting locked in on the doggy daycare YouTube videos
when Kelly and Malaika introduced themselves as our neighbors down the street
Katie’s voice note about the pod episode with Justin
Holding As hand while we realized Rubs was sleeping through the flight’s takeoff
My board of incredible little plates at Mad & Kaffe
Sitting in coffee collective watching A browse the coffee bags and observing the groups of people gathering over coffee
Sitting under the tree in the park with A and Rubs having our two pastries from Hart
The huge red hoptimist when I walked into Ilums Bolighus
Sending a photo of the huge hoptimist to em and gites
The large purple flowers on our walk with Rubs
Rubs enjoying her new cheese chew in my crisscross applesauce lap over afternoon drinks and a snack with A at Sidecar
Riding along the dusk lit water on the way to a sushi date night with A
Laughing with A throughout our sushi dinner at Sushi Anaba
A spooning me broth from his veggie dish when they forgot to add broth to mine
Realizing the sushi was going to be incredible after our first piece
Getting to know Oscar over breakfast and learning about his work creating community to foster innovative ideas and imagination
the goat brought on stage to present to Thomas Keller
the stellar lunch put together by the LA-based Anajak Thai team
the passion, sincerity, and authenticity of Micky while presenting about Ben’s Friends
Lizzie’s text about the pod episode with Justin
The sweetness of the Canadian girl serving our ice cream at Osterberg
Walking home with A under a newly rain-free sky eating our ice cream
Having coffee with A and Rubs in my lap at Darcy’s kaffe before biking to the symptom
A beautiful, long sunny bike ride to the symposium
Realizing Sanchez was the provider of breakfast on day 2 of the MAD symposium
The vegetable orchestra that kicked off the day 2 talks
Hearing Rob Hopkins talk about the importance of visioning for creating the future you want to see
The 4 young fisher women passionately speaking about the harms of sea farmed salmon and asking everybody to avoid buying it
the Patagonia founder, Yvon Chouinard, saying he didn’t want to play other people’s games so he made his own
Yvon’s story about his doctor’s son hiking a huge mountain completely naked
the groan of the chefs in the audience when Yvon implied all salt is equal
leaving the conference to eat omelettes with A at Amator
The elderly woman in a wheel chair eating a chicken kebab like a queen behind her family checking in at the airport
Finding out A got me a pastry from Rondo
Rubs interrupting my work to request I tug on her crinkly duck toy
The incredibly fragrant smell of the pink flowers on my way to the grocery store
Annnnnd that’s a wrap! A big one this week. I hope your upcoming week(end) is full of noticing the little joys in your days. Sending you a big squeeze <3 Thank you for being here again. :*
Love,
Syd